It's been awhile...

So, it's been almost a month since my last post and alot has happened in that time.

This past sunday I found a church that I think I reallly like. I am going to the Young Adults Night on friday to see if it's what I am looking for. More than anything, I need to get myself plugged in. It has been almost a year since I went to church regularly. I think it is the longest I have ever gone. It made me question alot of things, and I have. More than I ever wanted to, but i think that it is healthy for me to question my beliefs, if i don't, what kind of faith do i really have? a niave faith that i don't know why i have. I don't want that. But, now that I have those questions, i need someone to answer them. Me, sitting at home, is not going to help. I need to be fed, I need to reconnect.

This last year has been. well, hell. I don't even know the person I have become. I never thought I would be this broken person that I am. All i know is I don't want to be this person forever. I want to be me again. ANd my first step is Crossroads church. It is an Assemblies of God church in Moore, Oklahoma and i felt very comfortable there and i also felt free to worship. i haven't really felt free to worship since.... SNS @CCGF ended. that is a LONG time. I have worshiped since SNS, but I didn't feel free to do so, it has been more motion than anything else. I am really looking forward to this friday, I just hope I have the courage to put myself out there and not be the recluse I have become.

I guess we will just have to see how it goes.